Tomorrow is the big day . . .

I have my colonoscopy tomorrow which holds my future. I should not allow this procedure to hold such power, but I really need 2016 to be different . . . I put on a good face as always but I’m tired of faking that I’m so much happier lately feeling better  . . i’m not. And I feel like this illness has trapped me this past year. I was ready to quit my job and just move, anywhere . . can’t do that when you have a chronic illness and need a job to get health insurance to pay for your meds. . sighs . .

My Christmas was fine, but didn’t appreciate my love life being the main topic. I don’t understand why lately it’s been such a main topic among my family and friends lately .  .  . . I’m curious to know how many people that were sick that got healthy, and the first thing on their list is to find a husband/wife?? . . like that’s going to solve all my problems . . but I guess I can’t knock it until I try it. . .so to appease everyone i’m making a genuine effort to find my “love” in 2016. So when people ask again, I can say yes, i am no longer single . . .

Apologies for the melodramatics lol I’m on this liquid diet today, starving and dreading the Suprep I will have to consume in 4 hours and the results of it . . . I really need to stop planning these procedures around the holidays, sick of lying to people how great my holiday break was . . .

I need 2016 to be different  . .

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